Deep breathing...

For the most part I love my job. 

I love my job a lot. 

Love the people I work with. 

However as with most things the shine kind of comes off after a year. 

There have been some little things.  The building I'm in they are planning on doing major construction. So as you'd imagine there are some snafus. One of the snafus is that the heating and cooling can be an issue.  In April we had a warm streak.  I asked what the plan was since things started to get hot.  And by hot I mean the humidity was high.  I don't tolerate heat well.  Especially when gowned up in an isolation gown, a face mask, and a N95 and goggles and shields.  

The site manager and building manager all essentially told me I was being ridiculous.  That I was the only one complaining.  In May things got worse.  We had opened up on Sundays and honest to goodness I went around and the building temperature was 82 degrees with a high humidity.  

And at that point they realized I wasn't crazy.  No apology was issued.  At one point I was told I was hte only one complaining about the heat.  I may have said sarcastically have you talked to the patients.  They also realized that the air had been turned off at 5 pm (we close at 7) and they hadn't programmed the heaters for the weekends or after 5 pm.  

Recently an incident at work occurred - no patients were harmed, but with workplace violence an issue the response was lack luster.  I mentioned it in a social setting that I felt was a safe place to talk about this... and I heard from my boss and the words that were used was that I should not have mentioned it to anyone that once I had I became "dramatic" and "drama" and that she's heard that a few times.  That "You're a leader in this organization" and that "You have to realize that we are handling things" I may have gotten mad... Okay I got a lot mad.  I'm currently debating how to send an email that makes everyone understand that I will tolerate a lot. Do not ever call me dramatic when I am being many things - dramatic is not one of them. 

Pissed off - yes that is one of them. 

Feeling as if I've been treated as a child rather than the professional that I am... also yes. 

Anger.

 Hi again... 

I told you I'm dusting off the cobwebs and I have lots to say. 

A year ago I left an organization that I had been with just shy of 20 years.  I left to work with a different organization.  A much smaller one and to work as a nurse practitioner.  Let me just say I love working as a nurse practitioner.  I love the patients.  It's great. 

What don't I love? 

I don't love that I came from a management philosophy of if you had a problem with someone the manager was supposed to give you guidance to talk to that person first and then if that didn't solve the problem then you brought it to them.  The new org philosophy seems to be if you have a problem you automatically go to whatever manager is available. 

1st it's childish.  

2nd it creates distrust among workers. 

3rd it pisses me off. 

I also don't love that when I've brought up issues such as a lack of air conditioning at one point where the facility temperature was 78 degrees plus that I was essentially told that I was being dramatic.  Turns out they hadn't programmed the air for weekends or after 5 pm.  But I was being "drama" and I was being overly dramatic.  

I work weekends and nights and I'm literally the person on site in charge. A situation occurred not involving patients. I mentioned in a social setting that it didn't go quite as smoothly as one would hope.  The supervisor called me to say that I was creating drama and that it should have been kept on the down low.  That it created unnecessary fear. It was a healthcare worker safety issue.  Any person that worked at that site should have been notified via email.  It's almost a week later - no email has gone out of how we're going to improve the response.  

This was a situation of don't pee on my leg and tell me it's raining.  Because it's pee, not rain.  

It takes a lot to piss me off, but they finally managed to do it.  Apparently you hit the 1 year mark and people go from loving you to hating you.  

I spent 20 years in a job that I loved with people I didn't.  I won't do that to myself again.  I have a contract. The contract is until next August.  If things don't change then I'll do another year after that and leave.  I'm not going to be made to feel like I'm overreacting.  

I was forthright and honest with them about who I am and what I stand for. If I see something wrong I say something.  If I say something and weeks go by before anything is done then I'll say it again.  And if that makes me drama well so be it.  

I'm done being nice about things. 

You wanted to wake the beast... well here she is.  

So now I'm formulating my response.  Because I will finish out my contract.  I hoped this would be my retirement job.  You know the one you'll love for the rest of your career.  Right now I'm pissed, I'm hurt and well it's pretty bad when the cop goes - oh no you didn't just resign did you? 

*cough cough* Knocking off the cobwebs...

Knock knock... 

Cough cough - there's a lot of dust around here. 

So yeah hi! 

It's me Sami again... 

A lot may be wondering what I'm doing here again... 

Well life happens.  It's been almost 7 years since I last blogged.  Many may wonder why I chose to do it again. 

Primarily because I have a lot to say. 

I'm no longer in the trenches of trying to get pregnant. 

I'm firmly entrenched in my kids lives. 

I'm now a FNP and hubs is now my stay at home b*tch. 

Our original pups have been long gone.  

Ernie died about 5 years ago... 

Lola at the height of the COVID pandemic. 

Fred the geriatric cat died this year... 

We now have a cast of characters named... 

Winter - a white german shepherd poodle mix

Heidi - a Weimaraner from the same breeder who gave us Meg and the pups. 

Artax "Artie" - a black dachshund/stratfordshire terrier mix

and 

Wally the cat with his murder mittens... 

Nana is still around.  She has dementia.  I'll talk a lot about that. 

Squeaker is almost 15. 

Peanut just turned 11. 

Moose is 6 going on 7. 

Boy do I have stories.  

I realized I still have some anonymity and can post stuff on here that many in real life don't know about and I haven't figured out how to do that anonymously on the book of Face or twitter... 

So here I am.  

I'm working 40+ hours a week with a long commute... 

I miss the social aspect of all of you. 

I have lots to say... about life. About living with 3 kids, 3 dogs, a cat, a mom with dementia and a new stay at home husband... and getting it out is probably going to be the way I get through it all. 

Life is hard.  I don't say that lightly.  It is.  

So stay tuned.  I have charts to close, but I'm dabbling in jumping back in.