Sunday, December 04, 2005

Creeping in?

I'm 9 dpo today... and I'm still taking my temps, etc which of course are still high (thank you Mr. Progesterone). And that niggling little creature called Hope is starting to creep in. You know that annoying little voice in your head saying "It's a beautiful chart, could that be an implantation dip?" is becoming quite repetitive. My husband of course says this... "I'll believe we're pregnant when we actually see an ultrasound with something where it's supposed to be and frankly a heartbeat would be nice as well." Got to love his cynicism... I'm sad that it's come to that... that hope isn't automatically there... if and when we see a second line on an hpt - we both think - call get a blood test... get another one in 48 hours... then wait for the results to... double (stop laughing we've had them double once out of the 3 times and that was with the ectopic)... then wait for an u/s so we can know what to do... (Yeah I haven't ever reached u/s point so I'm not sure what to do about that.)

So hope or pessimism... I haven't figured out which little voice I'm going to listen to... I just pray that I make it through the holidays and hopefully get an early Christmas gift with a picture of a beating heart in my uterus rather than my fallopian tubes... excuse me while I go have that fantasy...

Also how do I explain to the nurses if no when I get a positive? When they ask for lmp I'd have to say 11/6, but I ovulated late... so should I just do the math and give them an adjusted date? decisions decisions... maybe I'll just run it by the nurse... God Hope can be so awful sometime... I'm already thinking about calling a nurse and I don't have a positive to show for it... this could be a rotten Christmas... will keep you posted.

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