Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Larry, Moe, and Curly...

Larry is measuring 9.5 on the right, Moe is measuring 9 on the right, and Curly is chugging the gonal-F like it's a beer bong and is at 12.5... My estrogen came back at 74 a little low... so we're rechecking on Friday. My HSG is scheduled for... 8:30 a.m. tomorrow... so it'll be a mad dash from work to GR... should be interesting. Hubby is driving... which means we could be late.

Right now projected trigger is on Saturday... I'm kind of hoping to sqeak out to Sunday... but that's just because it would be more convenient for our lives which means it is not going to happen.

Fear is something I try not to let rule my life... however I'll admit to nerves... I started doing a mini panic attack when she found Larry, then Moe... I got a bit better when she only found Curly on the other side. This is real... this could happen and if they keep telling me quality not quantity then I may shoot myself... What do I do if this does really happen... meaning we get a positive pregnancy test (not just the left over HCG from the trigger). How do I keep it together and not fret that it's ectopic or going to miscarry or it's triplets in the time between finding out and having an u/s? I don't know. Saying I haven't thought that far in advance would be a lie. Saying I'm trying to go with the flow about all this would be the truth. As most who know me know going with the flow is not something I do easily... in fact it's damn hard for me to do. Having faith that this will all work out in the end is taxing me... it's something I don't feel confident about... but hope I will in the future.

Until then... I'm praying that things go alright tomorrow and that by some miracle sperm meets egg and creates a beautiful baby... and that everything works out.

I wish that for each and every one of you that reads this blog... that we all get our happy ending and that it doesn't take us to the depths of depression or anger to get there. That we end up on the other side... looking back and going wow that was really a bumpy ride... but it was worth it in the end. That's truthfully all we can ask for isn't it? That it was worth it?

1 comment:

DinosaurD said...

Even with three follicles, didn't they tell you that triplets would be extremely unlikely? (each would need to yield a mature egg, each would need to fertilize correctly and then divide correctly - it's possible but not likely). I think it sounds like you're doing really well.
How can you be late with your husband driving - isn't he a cop? You mean all those cop shows aren't true???