Sunday, February 19, 2006

On my way?

Are we finally moving forward? The answer to this question is yes. My period showed up on Wednesday - which was good. I had my screening ultrasound on Friday and will have an HSG done on 2/22. So things are underway. I've been taking 75 of gonal-f each night and will report for another date with the dildo cam on 2/21.

My first date with the dildo cam was pretty uneventful. The nurse was very nice... and very quick. I am pretty sure that's a good thing... couple things I noticed... the room was warm... I didn't have to freeze my ass off. They gave me a real live fabric sheet rather than a paper towel. The stirrups had footies... and the lube was warm. I of course had been out and about and in the wilds of Michigan dealing with snow/ice storms so had not shaved my legs... felt a little bad about that... but still haven't shaved them. Will attempt to get that out of the way before I go back for my date. I'm hoping that this follicle scan shows... a couple meaning 2 max of 3 growing little monsters...

I'm also terrified that the HSG will show I have a 90 degree bend in my fallopian tubes and that they are the cause of my multiple miscarriages and of course the ectopic that we didn't find out about until after the d/c. I am of course trying to stay positive in spite of all this, but am also wishing that my xanax script wasn't for 2 measly pills, but really a whole bottle full because god I have never had my mind race quite so much about all the possibilities... and truly I'd like to shut down for a bit. Not worry about things, but that doesn't appear to be happening anytime soon.

Oh and tonight - I get to sit down with my in laws... this time for real. We're going to get them to talk about the family issues that are there but everyone is ignoring... and at the end if all goes well we may disclose our secret life... you know the one where we've been having the multiple miscarriages... yeah that one. This of course coincides with the birth of a little girl by the cousin's wife that is a chain smoking idiot... wonder why the kid at almost full term was 5 lbs 3 oz... can we all say growth retardation? Yep these are always the people who can reproduce without a problem... got to love them... or NOT!

1 comment:

DinosaurD said...

I hope the in-law thing goes well for you. My husband and I largely avoid his parents - it's just easier that way. Someone told my mother-in-law about at least one of our miscarriages and the next time we saw her, she just "casually" started talking about how wonderful second children are (which we were never successful obtaining). I hope your experience is better but if it isn't, it's a reflection on your in-laws and not you.