Saturday, February 10, 2007


I may have exaggerated my feelings a bit yesterday. I re-read what I wrote and thought - god she's a neurotic self absorbed snot. In truth while we are worried/concerned/anxious about this whatever you want to call it... we generally go about our daily lives as if nothing is going on.

I had a friend call the other day and things were a bit nuts at our house at the time and she is aware of what's going on and said "S you need to relax right now." I started laughing almost hysterically and then handed the phone to D... he then started laughing as well. I got back on the phone and told her that whether I'm relaxed or tense or even catatonic - whatever will happen will happen. That the ball is already in play, that the ship has already sailed, that the rollercoaster is already going, that the bullet will either hit the target or not. She didn't quite understand all the little things, but I think she finally understands. There's not a bit that I can do other than what I am doing. Which what I'm doing involves daily shots of PIO, baby aspirin and a prenatal vitamin so there ya go...

If we didn't have that and I wasn't abstaining from alcohol and s*x it'd be just a regular time in our lives. Those are about the only things that have been cut out so to speak. Alcohol for obvious reasons ans s*x because well of that darn thing called spot. D doesn't want to sound like an ungrateful snot and ask the RE if we can - the nurse told me that we couldn't - D didn't get to hear those words so hence why he's hesistant to ask and keeps asking if the spotting is done... I had to remind him of the instructions after the D & C and then he wanted the scientific reasons why you're not supposed to. I was trying to sleep at that point and I believe I rolled over and hit him and said he could google it later.

I know there is such romantic love in our household if it's not us yelling "Bah" and throwing things at the dogs (not hitting them with it just landing near them) or squirting a squirt bottle at the puppies then it's a discussion on why you can or can't have s*x. Fun times.

In a side note - We live alone... and our shades are always closed. This weekend my mom is visiting and D almost walked out into the living room naked with her here - he was trying to find some clean jeans (located in the dryer)... If he hadn't heard her talking to the dogs she would have gotten a full frontal of D. I about peed my pants when he came running into the bathroom and told me what had almost occurred. Fortunately my mom was spared the image and D was spared the mortification. I think his heart rate is finally returning to normal now.

In other news - my mom has been here and you have to love a woman who will clean your entire house and fold your laundry... and while she makes Ernie act like an idiot she loves all our dogs though she is calling the puppies by the wrong names - this isn't unusual.

My husband has a list of things he wants... s*x is on that list, but there are other things baby is on the list, but again not the things I'm talking about... he wants - a fenced in back yard, new doors and windows- don't ask he hates ours - they work in my mind, a hair cut - heck I want that one too he's starting to look way too shaggy, a new vehicle - NOT happening, another gun (NOT happening, and I'm sure there's more I could add to the list - probably landscaping, someone else to paint the house and patch holes, and well ya know just about everything else under the sun. Yet I am the one accused of having expensive tastes. Yeah uhmm not. I'm the one who has been reigning D in... reminding him how much money we have, that if we do indeed make it to take home baby that we need to have x saved so that we can survive while I'm on maternity leave, that we have to do this that and the other thing... such a pain.

I truly hate being the voice of reason. It's just not my favorite thing to do... especially when all I want to do is spend spend spend.

Ah well what you going to do... apparently just continue putting one foot in front of the other and hope that I don't run into anything.


DinosaurD said...

Just for the record, I have never thought of you as "god she's a neurotic self absorbed snot". Not even a little bit.
The fact is, where you are at right now is great but the stress, good lord, the stress.
I hope Ernie's ear is doing better and that he is not too lop-sided when he shakes his head now.
I trust you had the crime scene cleaned up prior to your mom's arrival?

Amy said...

Can I post yet???

Amy said...

Okay, it works (that was a test post...I've been trying and it keeps saying "user account not found").

Anyway, I wanted to say that you sure don't sound to me like you're being neurotic and self-absorbed. You sound like a woman who's been traumatized by too many miscarriages. Apprehension comes with the territory. I'm SO thinking of you!! I'll be anxious to see Friday's post (yes, you're actually on my calendar so I can make sure I remember to check-in that day).