Sunday, April 30, 2006

What's a family dinner if you don't...

Piss off Grandma...

Let me just say for the record I didn't know she was going to be there. D didn't know she was going to be there. We're not avoiding her, we just like to know these things. Primarily because if I'm going to have to deal with an acid filled stomach for dinner I want to pop the tums before hand. I also don't truthfully enjoy pissing her off. I prefer a good debate about politics. Uncomfortable family arguments where no one actually gets to the heart of the issue really are not on my list of things I enjoy.

Anyways bottom line I didn't even start this conversation. She did. You remember the name of this blog right? He's a cop, I'm a nurse we have 3 dogs and we want a baby... or something like that. Anyways... she was fishing. Fishing for information about D's cousin's accident. D is not involved in the accident investigation at all. He never has been. So... asking him what they could possibly be doing at the accident scene 7 months after the accident. He answered truthfully - I have no idea. They may have been there for another accident. I pointed out that it was a busy stretch of road and that ultimately we need to trust that the officers that were there were doing their jobs. D's grandma at that point huffed. I finally had to say - it's not in the county that this happened hands... it's in the hands of a special prosecutor that is totally neutral. If charges are filed they will be. She then promptly said it was a cover up, conspiracy etc. I laughed. I laughed a lot and said really and you have proof of this? I also pointed out if she wanted information regarding the investigation then she could go and get a copy of the report according to the freedom of information act. She huffed again.

I think huffing is the thing that tends to make me want to poke her with a stick. She wanted to drop it at that point. Oh no Grandma.. you went to far... So I pointed out that the officers whatever they were there for were doing their job, that if she had wanted to know what they were doing she could have stopped and asked rather than going on a whim that has no basis in reality. That her grandson, my husband does his job. That contrary to what she believes that the majority of officers are not corrupt and that I have faith in the judicial system.

I'm not sorry for it. D isn't upset with me - he's actually proud of me. D and I talked on the way back to my mom's... when I whined (yes I whined) why can't you have a nice grandma? His response I did... she died. My response - is there any way we can get her back? No, but she would have LOVED you. Awww at least one of his grandparents would have loved me. Apparently just getting D into a church, let alone getting him to agree to baptism and membership in an organized religion would have put me on the top of his other grandma's list. I can at least safely say that there are many things I've accomplished in my relationship with D... helping him to find his faith is one I can safely say I think is the best one of all.

Now the one thing I can be thankful for is that somehow my mother in law has not told my grandmother in law about our rpl. I think I can safely say I don't want that old bat knowing anything in regards to our reproductive woes... Sometimes it pays to have a mil that is uncomfortable with the words - sex, miscarriage, infertility issue.


Jill said...

I'm sorry there was strife at the family dinner. With all you have been through lately, that was the last thing you needed. Hang in there.

Marz said...

You have had problems with this grandmother before, have you not?
Glad hubby agrees with you.

Sami said...

Jill - that was my thought - haven't we dealt with enough stuff lately?

Leia's mom - yeah the old bat has been a thorn in our side for a little while... we usually ignore her behavior, however it's gotten a little more obvious.